Outguess Ebert? I may have them all right

This year’s Outguess Ebert contest seems a little like shooting fish in a barrel. For the first time in many a year, maybe ever, I think I’ve guessed every one correctly.A few years ago, I came across an article about the newly identified psychological concept of Elevation. Scientists claim it is as real as love or fear. It describes a state in which we feel unreasonable joy; you know, like when you sit quiet and still and tingles run up and down your back, and you think things can never get any better.

I tried applying it to that year’s Oscar nominees. Did it work any better than any other approach? You need Elevating nominees. An example of Elevation would be when the bone morphs into a space station in “2001.” Did I feel Elevation in making any of my Guesses this year. That doesn’t mean it was a bad year at the movies. Harvey Weinstein, accepting his achievement award from the Producers’ Guild, said he thought 2012 was the best in 90 years. Maybe he felt Elevation when he gazed upon the Weinstein Company’s box office figures.

March 21, 2013

What was my Aunt Martha trying to ask me?

After she had the heart attack out in Michigan on Thanksgiving 1988, I stood by her bedside in the recovery room and she tried so hard to tell me something, but it just didn’t work. I loved her so much. Did she know how much? I never told her. There are always questions you wish you’d asked after it’s too late to get an answer. Sometimes years can pass before you realize they’re questions.

Everyone said I “took after her,” and I did. My features are more rounded than anyone else on either side of my family. Martha R. Stumm was the youngest of six surviving children of a Dutch-Irish-German couple who raised their family on a farm outside Tayorville, Illinois. Years after after her father died and her mother opened a boarding house in Urbana, enough oil was found beneath the land to make it worth drilling.

March 21, 2013
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