From Andy Ihnatko, Boston, MA:
Enjoyed your piece about James Lipton’s early days as a pimp. Of course, the tape ran out before Lipton got to the most important part:
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And now, we conclude the negotiation, as always, with the famous Ten Questions:
10. What is your most-favorite “safe” word?
9. What is your least-favorite word to discover tattooed on a courtesan’s neck or inner thigh?
8. What turns you on?
7. Would an herbal substitute purchased over the Internet suffice?
6. What sound or noise would indicate that you love what she’s doing to you with the electric tongs?
5. What sound or noise do you hate to hear after you’ve been rendered helpless by multiple latex restraints and gags?
4. What is your favorite curse word? We have to make sure it’s not the same as your “safe” word; we gave out wayyyy too many refunds before we started asking that question
3. What profession other than the one you’ve selected would you like your consort to attempt to roleplay, if our wardrobe department can’t assemble a firefighting dolphin costume in time?
2. What profession would you find the most humiliating and degrading to perform, if The Iron Nun were to burst into the room and mercilessly paddle you until you submitted to her demands?
…And finally:
1. You’re not a cop, are you?”
