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Same Kind of Different as Me

It can be hard to disagree with the heart and events of this true tale, except for when the movie reveals itself to be mighty…

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God knows how many millions of dollars and hours of manpower went into making and remaking Geostorm but it turns out to have been all…

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Ballad of Narayama

"The Ballad of Narayama" is a Japanese film of great beauty and elegant artifice, telling a story of startling cruelty. What a space it opens…

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Hashtag Confidential: #geriatricnoir

This is why I sometimes love Twitter. Wednesday afternoon I stumbled upon some funny tweets with the hashtag #geriatricnoir, which was actually "trending" for a bit, thanks to contributing comedians, critics and movie lovers. Here are some of my favorites from this fleeting moment in tweeting, including some of my own:

@pattonoswalt The Big Nap #geriatricnoir

@DelilahSDawson The Postman Rang Nine Times Before I Heard It #geriatricnoir

@kriscollins The Talented Mr. Brimley #geriatricnoir

@pattonoswalt Death Wore Depends #geriatricnoir


@sfcaadam Chinamentown #geriatricnoir

@RockabillyJa The Glass Hip #geriatricnoir

@DrMadoror The Postman Always Rings Right in the Middle of Murder, She Wrote #geriatricnoir

@Ugaries Dial M for what are all these buttons? #geriatricnoir

@jondaly Vertigo #geriatricnoir

@brofromanother The Big Heating Pad #geriatricnoir

@j_christley Pinochle in the Streets #geriatricnoir

@j_christley The Wrong Pan #geriatricnoir

@jeeemerson They Live By Nightlight #geriatricnoir

@jessehawken After Matlock, My Sweet #geriatricnoir

@brofromanother I'm a Fallen Angel and I Can't Get Up #geriatricnoir

@brofromanother He Used a Walker By Night #geriatricnoir

@jeeemerson Hiccup on South Street #geriatricnoir

@Nicolucci1899 Little Caesar Salad (And Can I Take the Rolls Home With Me?) #geriatricnoir

@j_christley In a Lonely Place #geriatricnoir #seewhatididthere #oldpeoplearelonely

@Benschwartzy They Can't Drive By Night #geriatricnoir

@paulcibis White Heat (but it's a dry heat) #geriatricnoir

@jeeemerson Where the Curb Cut Ends #geriatricnoir

@genegeorge The Big Sleep Apnea #geriatricnoir

@wordhole Pick-Up My Prescription on South Street #geriatricnoir

@ExtAngel The File on Thelma Ritter #geriatricnoir

@ExtAngel I've Fallen and I Can't Get Up on South Street #geriatricnoir

@robcorddry The Maltese Vacation We Took in '81 with Shirley, Bob, Beverly and... Wait, was Beverly there? Everyone I know is dead. #geriatricnoir

@ChrisRRegan Sorry, Wrong Number. But I'll Be Happy To Give You My Credit Card Info #geriatricnoir

@Andy_Richter The Postman Always Seems to be a Mexican These Days #geriatricnoir


@zhandlen Pickup On South Oh My God, There Goes My Back #geriatricnoir

@T_FUTURIST They Have Such Small Portions at the House of Bamboo #geriatricnoir

@mattsinger Se7enty #geriatricnoir

@tnyfrontrow To Have and Not Remember Where I Put It #geriatricnoir

@TonyDayoub Lost on a Highway #geriatricnoir

@ChrisWillman I Wake Up Kvetching #geriatricnoir

@ChrisWillman The Big Typeface #geriatricnoir

@CrazyHorse2012 Dial M for Matlock #geriatricnoir

@ian_okc Strangers On A Train (Don't Like It When I Fill My Depends)

@ChrisWillman On Dangerous Linoleum #geriatricnoir

@jeeemerson The Strange Dentures of Martha Raye #geriatricnoir

@jeeemerson Gum Crazy #geriatricnoir

@jeeemerson Rash by Night #geriatricnoir

@Jinjerman Blood Sample #geriatricnoir

@jeeemerson The Woman in the Widow #geriatricnoir (I'd actually like to see this movie)

@LouLumenick Murder, My Feet #geriatricnoir

@j_christley The Big Chemo #geriatricnoir

@jeeemerson Murder By Co-Pay #geriatricnoir

@jeeemerson Out of the Pravastatin #geriatricnoir

@LouLumenick The Woman in the Window Should Close the Blinds #geriatricnoir

@jeeemerson Night and the Setee #geriatricnoir

@jgonick Strangers On A Train (and Other People I Like Talking To) #geriatricnoir

@jeeemerson My E-mail Always Dings Twice and It Scares Me #geriatricnoir

@jeeemerson Shoot the Player Piano #geriatricnoir

@jeeemerson While the City Sleeps I Have This Terrible Insomnia #geriatricnoir

@j_christley Kiss Tomorrow Goodbye, Pretty Much #geriatricnoir


... And then there was a short run of #geriatricgodard:

@T_FUTURIST Film SocialSecurity #geriatricgodard

@jeeemerson Out of Breath #geriatricgodard


@LCosgrove Wind From the East Just Blew a Bunch of Leaves Onto My Lawn #geriatricgodard

@jeeemerson La Chinoise Buffet #geriatricgodard

@T_FUTURIST Alzheimerville #geriatricgodard

@lokar20 Waistband of Outsiders #geriatricgodard

@jeeemerson Numéro deux and I mean now! #geriatricgodard

@paperlung Pierrot Le Vieux #geriatricgodard

@justinbhorton That's not red, it's blood! #geriatricgodard

@NGRLUK Tout Va Bien, A Part Mon Arthrite #geriatricgodard

@jeeemerson 2 or 3 Things I Forgot About... What? #geriatricgodard

- - - - -

¹ I'm 53 going on death, so I feel I'm entitled to laugh at my fate.

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