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Why we are all doomed

Director Richard Kelly. (Note motion picture camera.) Not to be confused with suspected terrorist James Kelly. Or soap-operatic rapper (and little girl fancier) R. Kelly. Or "Singin' in the Rain" dancer Gene Kelly. Or former Princess of Monaco Grace Kelly.…

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Rally 'round the Cruise, boys!

The Attitude in action. (photo: Mario Anzuoni/Reuters) At first I wasn't going to write anything about last weekend's "disappointing" domestic grosses for "M:I:III" (or, as Stephen Colbert pronounces it, "Miiii"), because, well, who really cares about the box-office numbers of…

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Shelley Winters: Queen of the watery demise

Herewith, a belated salute, on the occasion of the sailing of the revamped "Poseidon," to the late, great Shelley Winters. At a party of movie geeks on a rainy Seattle night -- the evening of her death (January 14, 2006)…

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MPAA Promotional Poetry Anthology, Vol. II

"Twister": Bovine poetry in motion. Readers have sent in some choice bits of poetry and prose from the MPAA's Classification and Ratings Administration, which I consider to be the institutional poet laureate of Hollywood. Chris Finke writes: "I work in…

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Notable MPAA Press Releases 1: DVD-sniffing dogs

Lucky and Flo, the DVD-sniffing labs. Excerpt from MPAA Press Release (link to .pdf file): [May 9, 2006] United Kingdom, Los Angeles - - The Federation Against Copyright Theft (FACT), express delivery company FedEx and HM Revenue & Customs, has…

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The promotional poetry of the MPAA

A disturbing image of frenetic violence and menace -- and some sensuality, if you're into the whole Cronenbergian "Crash" thing. You may not have noticed one of the most exciting blurbs appearing in ads for "Mission: Impossible III." It reads:…

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Sure to be... what?

Philip Seymour Hoffman is the bad guy in "M:I:III." "Sure to be one of the best films of the year." -- Jeffrey Lyons (on "The Prize Winner of Defiance, Ohio") "Anthony Hopkins gives one of his finest, most endearing performances…

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The fillet of fests

"Junebug" director (and still photographer!) Phil Morrison at the Overlooked. (Photo by Jim Emerson) At several moments during the Eighth Overlooked Film Festival, I thought I had been transported to a time in which the greatest artists of the movies…

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Tom Cruise, The Movie

"M:I:III": To see or not to see? Quick: When you think "Tom Cruise," what's the first thing that pops into your mind? Tabloid celebrity? Love-struck happy dad? Couch-jumper? Noted skeptic and scholar of the history of psychology and psychopharmacology? Censor?…

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Stephen Colbert, hero

The thing about speaking truth to power is that the powerful don't really like it all that much. That was apparent at the White House Correspondents Dinner Saturday night, when Stephen Colbert of Comedy Central's satirical "The Colbert Report" (basically…