In Memoriam 1942 – 2013 “Roger Ebert loved movies.”

RogerEbert.com

Thumb_sea_of_trees_ver5

The Sea of Trees

The Sea of Trees uses depression, cancer and suicide as manipulative devices to tug at heartstrings instead of offering even the slightest insight into the…

Thumb_dont_breathe

Don't Breathe

Don’t Breathe gets a little less interesting as it proceeds to its inevitable conclusion, but it works so well up to that point that your…

Other Reviews
Review Archives
Thumb_uwwxd6bjuyrpw6iiniwfidyn6jc

The Decalogue

On Kieslowski's "The Decalogue," now being released theatrically in restored form and soon on Criterion Blu-ray.

Thumb_xbepftvyieurxopaxyzgtgtkwgw

Ballad of Narayama

"The Ballad of Narayama" is a Japanese film of great beauty and elegant artifice, telling a story of startling cruelty. What a space it opens…

Other Reviews
Great Movie Archives
Other Articles
Blog Archives

Reviews

G-Force

G-Force Movie Review
  |  

"G-Force" is a pleasant, inoffensive 3-D animated farce about a team of superspy guinea pigs who do battle with a mad billionaire who wants to conquer the earth by programming all the home appliances made by his corporation to follow his instructions. It will possibly be enjoyed by children of all ages.



The film is non-stop, wall-to wall madcap action. It's possible to imagine Jerry Bruckheimer, the producer, and his cast and crew side by side with the little creatures on their whirling hamster wheels. But be careful what you say out loud. The guinea pigs resent being mistaken for hamsters, as do we all.

The evil billionaire is named Saber, and played by Bill Nighy in what we might describe as a one-of-a-kind performance. The FBI has been on his trail for two years, but in one single night the G-Force is able to save the planet, by stealthily introducing a worm, or virus, or something into his diabolical software. All of the cyber work is done by a keyboard whiz with the intensity appropriate for a programmer racing to key in code to outwit the program. You should see that little fella type. Man, oh man.

There are a limited number of other creatures in the film, including the guinea pigs' gaseous hamster friend, who is loudly and frequently flatulent. I thought I heard some of his pals calling him "Farty," but that could be just me. The G-Force also includes Darwin (Sam Rockwell), Juarez (Penélope Cruz) and Bucky (Steve Buscemi). Nicholas Cage plays a mole named Speckles with a wise lack of his usual intensity. You don't want a hyperactive mole. I didn't know they have those twitchy pink feelers on their noses. Must tickle. Juarez (Penelope Cruz) provides the animal sex appeal, although, you ask me, one guinea pig looks about like another.

Now here is the neat part. How will the remote-controlled home appliances conquer the earth? Well, sir, they will all fly together and amalgamate themselves into gigantic robots made of assorted mechanical parts. We see one of these metal monsters, and why, if I didn't know better, I'd have to say it looks like a...yes, I think so... a... Transformer! Except made from Cuisinarts instead of Chevys. How will they all conquer the earth? By stomping on things.

The G-Force rodents pick up another pal along the way; he’s Hurley (voice of Jon Favreau), the chubby guinea pig. These slave appliances can be dangerous. Hurley becomes entrapped in a microwave oven, which cycles itself through several settings, from Cake to Chicken, yet is unable to cook its captive. I had a microwave like that once. It wouldn't cook doodley-squat.

There is also a human cast, including not only Bill Nighy but Kelli Garner as a veterinarian, Zach Galifianakis as a big, shaggy guy, Will Arnett as a thin, not shaggy guy, and Gabriel Casseus as Agent Trigstad. Anything else you need to know?



Popular Blog Posts

Hollywood Gave Up on You: The Summer Movies of 2016

A look back at how this summer's best offering, Netflix's "Stranger Things," makes the failure of this season's block...

Who do you read? Good Roger, or Bad Roger?

This message came to me from a reader named Peter Svensland. He and a fr...

The Top 11 Female Film Characters of All Time

All month, the Alliance of Women Film Journalists has been counting down the top 55 female film characters of all tim...

Dirty Politics May Ruin Distribution, Oscar Chances of Phenomenal "Aquarius"

Pablo Villaça reports on the sad status of Brazil's government and its possible effect on a phenomenal new film from ...

Reveal Comments
comments powered by Disqus